I’ve done a great deal of consulting involving “empowering” workforces (today often called “agency”). I define “empowerment” as having control over the decisions that influence the outcome of your work. I devised a “playing field” metaphor, that showed the boundaries as being ethics, finance, legal, and reputation. An employee had the freedom to make decisions on that field unless it was apparent that a boundary was being approached, in which case the manager was consulted as to whether to proceed.
This worked wonderfully, so long as the playing field was large enough and not the size of a postage stamp!
I’ve come to see boundaries, however, as often missing in our personal lives. We are told that love, and passion, and friendship should be “boundaryless.” Not so fast! Our privacy and our time are often breached by people who don’t respect, or are blind to, our boundaries. Of course, we often don’t establish them with any clarity. It’s hard to stay off the lawn when you don’t know where the lawn begins.
I’ve found myself, or one of my well-known companions, interrupted at dinner by someone asking questions while standing and hovering over my Cacio e Pepe. I don’t like people telling me what they do or asking what I do just because they’re sitting next to me on airplanes. I tell them that I have to do some work and pop on headphones. (Or I tell them I’m a fundraiser and would love to discuss their participation.)
I’ve always advised not to listen to unsolicited feedback because it’s always for the sender. Don’t hesitate to shut it down. “Can I offer you some feedback?” “No, thanks, but I don’t want to hear it.” (I heard a remarkably unkempt woman once tell the professional, stylish speaker on stage that she should never wear blue.)
Tell passive aggressive people that they’re trying to be hurtful, and you won’t tolerate it, so they should keep their opinions to themselves. Tell people who offer advice or criticize your choices that you don’t recall having asked their opinion.
Do I sound harsh? I’m doing the person a favor by notifying them that there are boundaries and they’re about to violate one, so change direction. Form your boundaries ex nihilo: simply decide where they’re needed.
Easter approaches, and Jesus said to turn the other cheek, but He didn’t say to let them keep hitting you. There was a boundary. Even saints had boundaries. St. Augustine famously prayed, “Lord, please make me a good man. But not too soon.”

Daring to set boundaries is about having the courage to love ourselves, even when we risk disappointing others. —Brene Brown
To me there's no creativity without boundaries. If you're gonna write a sonnet, it's 14 lines, so it's solving the problem within the container. —Lorne Michaels
People who don't have experience setting healthy boundaries, they have secrets instead. —Jill Soloway
Here's the deal: I won't tell you how to make transmissions, and you don't tell me how to consult. —Alan Weiss (to the Mercedes Benz Vice President for North America)