I’ve been helping people find true love for more than 20 years now and in that time, I’ve uncovered 10 inescapable dating truths when looking for a life partner.

Whether you’re just starting your dating journey or have been searching for a while, these are universal principles that will improve your experience. These aren’t just tips—they’re truths, grounded in real-life successes and challenges I’ve encountered with my clients. Embracing these truths can help you approach dating with clarity, confidence, and optimism. After all, dating isn’t about finding just anyone—it’s about finding the one who aligns with your deepest values and long-term goals.

Here are my Top 10 Dating Truths which I hope will guide you in your search for a spouse or life partner:

1. You will connect more deeply with someone when you share your core relationship values and life goals.

   Core values are the foundation of any strong partnership. Do you understand your own values and life goals? Do you understand your own values and how they relate to your life goals? Do you know how to communicate these to a potential love interest? Before seeking a partner, get clear on these so you can better evaluate your compatibility with someone of interest.

2. Dating is a feedback loop.

   Take a look at your past actions and assess what worked for you and what didn’t. Then refine your process until you do find that right special someone. Don’t get stuck on regret, focus on growth. Think of each date and relationship as an opportunity to learn more about yourself and what you truly need. Adjust your approach as needed, and remember that every step brings you closer to the right match.

3. Dating requires you to look at your whole life and be clear about what you want.

   If you can’t make dating a priority right now, it’s not the right time for you to search for a spouse or life partner. Being honest with yourself is key. Life gets busy, but a serious search for a life partner requires commitment. Evaluate whether you have the time and energy to dedicate to this journey. If you don’t, it’s okay to hit pause and revisit when you’re ready.

4. How you feel about marriage is how you date for marriage!

   If you see marriage as a partnership of equals, you’ll naturally seek someone who values collaboration and respect.  On the other hand, if you have reservations about commitment, it’s worth exploring those feelings before embarking on a serious search. And how you feel about marriage from your past experiences with family and friends, as well as perhaps, a divorce, or as a widow, is how you approach dating for marriage.

5. Focus on what you have to offer to a relationship instead of what you don’t.

   We all have strengths and unique qualities that make us lovable. By highlighting what you bring to the table—kindness, humor, resilience, or ambition—you’ll attract someone who appreciates you for who you are. So don’t focus on what you perceive to be a detraction. Instead, embrace your heart and the wonderful qualities that you have to offer to a relationship. 

6. For your first date remember to manage your expectations.

   You are just going on a date.  Don’t even think about, “Can I marry this person?”.  Give yourself the time to learn about someone before you say, “No, thank you!” Approaching a first date with curiosity rather than pressure makes the experience more enjoyable for both parties. Focus on building rapport and discovering shared interests & values, letting deeper connections unfold naturally over time. 

7. When assessing someone as a life partner, look for his or her “capacity” or ability and desire to be in a committed coupled relationship.

   Remember, actions speak louder than words! Pay attention to how they show up for you. Are they consistent, kind, and reliable? A partner’s actions will always reveal their readiness for commitment more than their words ever could. Don’t allow the desire for love to cause you to ignore this dating truth or a person’s true nature.

8. Dating is an inside effort.

   It’s important to first have a clear sense of your life goals and values before you can choose a life partner. This is where introspection pays off. If you’re clear about what you want from life—whether it’s a certain lifestyle, family, or career—you’ll naturally seek someone whose vision matches up with yours. And you will be able to move on from the wrong relationship more quickly.

9. Check out how you are “being” as you are dating and searching for a life partner.

   People are attracted to positive people who know what they want out of life. A positive outlook and self-assuredness are magnetic. When you exude confidence and a sense of purpose, you’re more likely to draw in a partner who shares your energy and vision.

10. Everyone deserves to be loved. Never give up hope!

    No matter how long the journey feels, remember that love is not out of reach. Every step you take brings you closer to the right person. It can take 6 months or 3 years. Yet my clients that don’t give up, do find their ideal partner.

Dating is a journey, and each dating truth on this list is a stepping stone to the partnership you’ve been dreaming of. 

You have the power to create the love life you desire- one intentional step at a time. These dating truths aren’t just ideas; they’re principles that have helped my clients transform their dating lives and find meaningful, lasting relationships.

The journey to finding true love may have its ups and downs, but with clarity, self-awareness, and a commitment to growth, you’ll be well on your way to meeting the life partner you’ve been searching for.

If you’re truly ready to meet your life partner, I’d love to help you take the next step. With my Motivated to Marry methodology, we can work together to create a personalized plan that aligns with your values and life goals. True love is out there waiting for you—let’s make it happen.

Are you sure you’re ready for lasting love? Take my FREE “Are You Ready to Meet Your Mate” Quiz and find out! Go to https://motivatedtomarry.lpages.co/take-the-mtm-quiz/ today!