Life is About Choice—Your Choice

By Marilyn L Redmond

It may seem like the roof is caving in, all of life is fanatical,with taxes and wars never ending. Have you noticed that when life has smoothedout then another issue arises? The vicissitudes of life are there for a reason.Ultimately, they bring balance.  

Our lives have a purpose and each event, good or bad, havemeaning for us to examine. The ones we call bad are there to teach us a lesson.What did the situation emotionally trigger in you? Did you get angry, getrevenge, or get sullen. Is that how you dealt with this kind of situationgrowing up or early in your life? Do you continue to react in this kind of lifesituation and things seem to never change?

When I was older, I learned that I had to change with a new responseinstead of acting from my old ways. I did not have to stay in my immaturechildish ways of acting. I had been reacting from some kind of fear. In myearly growing up, my parents did the best that they could, but as a child, Idid not see it that way, In my feeling insecure, feeling a lack of, feelinglonely, or rejected. I wanted love, caring, and hugs saying I love you.   

Being naïve, I married and recreated the family in which Igrew up. The roof was still caving in after a few years. I was not taught abouthow life worked or how to have trust, communications, or feelings. I was stuck ata young age, emotionally. I remember at the age of five telling myself,"If being an adult is about fighting every night, then I do not want togrow up." 

I continued my immaturity into my fifties, married as ateacher, mother, and working in the family business. I was never given achoice. I was a great "doer". Through circumstances, I found aspiritual program that had information very new to me. My first insight wasthat I had been living in fear. In addition, my new information had answersdifferent from the religion in which I was raised.

I found new answers to be helpful in all parts of my life. Icould respond to life situations in loving resolutions, instead of my old ways.I learned that I was like a magnet in the fear and the fearful situations keptcoming to me. Making a list of the fears and reframing them into positivethoughts was bringing better results.  WhenI saw that this was improving my life, I continued to find my guilt, shame,jealousy, and other negative thinking to restate them into positive perceptionscalled affirmations.

I could claim the truth about myself. I was not unworthy,without value, or used merchandize. I could substitute the positive for thenegative. This brought truth into my life. Continuing through many years ofself-searching, prayer, and meditation to replace the misinformation, lies, andfalse beliefs was my inner work. Each time brought more peace and grace into mylife. I felt a relief as my awareness moved into a higher consciousness of abeneficent universe that created it all. I began to see that the fear hadblocked my vision of truth, where all is good. The fear was an illusion andblocked the truth that love is reality.

Making this change takes faith and trust in a higher power. Isaw myself walk into the hands of a loving Creator leaving the past behind. Ichose to have a life seeing the positive in all things. With my new choicesover time, I moved more into a higher realization. Life was becoming better, Ifelt better, and I could see that life is good. I was going through a transitioninto new understandings about life. Ultimately, I gave up beliefs and now comefrom my heart instead of my head.

I could give up the judgment I learned so well from mymother. This allows me to be in a non-judgmental awareness about life andpeople. In changing myself, I became a new person as if I had a new pair ofglasses. I finally realized they were my teachers to teach me to turn to"The Father of Light" in all things. Love and light are the sameenergy.  

The past anguish brought me to turn to a loving universe forhelp and support. If I stayed in my pain and anger, I could not have grown intomy new world of seeing life and those challenges as opportunities to grow andmature. I would have remained immature and childish. I found forgiveness andcompassion for those in my past that brought on difficult situations. Gradually,I was able to thank them in prayer, as they had past.

I have grown up and am grateful for all the good things I didnot glimpse before. Learning to "let go and let God", I no longerneeded to run from life. I could accept life on life's terms, even if I was notthrilled about it. I do not resist, but accept it learning the lesson to movebeyond my old thoughts, words, or actions. I can choose to have love be myguide and foundation in life's experiences. Those experiences become wisdom. Thisbrings joy and fills me with the love I always wanted and was only hidden. . Lovenever fails.