Starkman, Scales and Roberts in their book Great Places to Learn share a story about Mary Yagel who has been a bus driver in Upstate New York for 30 years. Mary not only personally greets and introduces herself to all new students using their name, she takes their picture and at Christmas or another holiday she surprises them with a hand-designed card with their photograph on it.  She also gives "Mary-made" pins made from pipe cleaners, beads, twine or whatever meets her fancy.  Mary understands the importance of developing a relationship with her students and creating a supportive school bus culture. Most  importantly, Mary cares.

    In an anti-bullying program developed by the NAPT, the Education Department's Office of Safe and Drug-Free Schools and the Safe and Supportive Schools Technical Assistance Center, practical suggestions on creating a supportive climate on buses include the following:

• Greet with positive verbal and nonverbal gestures such as giving the high five.
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• Welcome students back when they have been absent. We all love to be missed and know that we matter.
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• Show that you care.  Observe and comment on a student's mood changes.
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• Comment on a student's talents, gifts and strengths.  We all have them.
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• Be there for them. You may be the one person and only person who is.
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• Establish clear expectations. Post the rules on the bus.
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• Be firm (not tough), courteous (not sarcastic), fair and consistent.
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• Be in charge.

    The training program also emphasizes that drivers respond differently to a one-time physical encounter (fight) or verbal argument and repeated patterns of abuse that become a systematic process. The program encourages bus drivers to become engaged and an active participant in creating an emotionally and physically safe environment. Drivers learn not to challenge or provoke aggression, but rather de-escalate and stabilize potentially dangerous situations. While there are times when it may be appropriate to ignore minor squabbles, in general, passivity is permission and encouragement. Drivers are reminded their responsibilities extend beyond the bus and proper follow-up and reporting to the schools, parents and even law enforcement is part of the job. Many of these suggestions should be practiced in the classroom and in the home as well. 

Edie Raether is an international speaker, therapist and bestselling author with one of her books being Stop Bullying Now.  Visist www.stopbullyingwithedie.com.