Do you know what kind of person would make you happy? What qualities would you want when choosing your life partner? As human beings, we all respond to certain gestures and behaviors in a positive way. My dating advice for those looking for love is to describe which qualities you need to have on your radar screen when choosing your life partner.

I recommend you look for the following relationship qualities as you evaluate someone as a Motivated to Marry Partner.

1. Does this person offer you genuine friendship?

What I hear from my clients when considering how to choose their life partner is that they want someone who is their best friend! Someone who will have their back and can be there for them through thick and thin. We want to choose a partner with whom we can share our deepest thoughts as well as with whom we can have fun.

When I ask my clients to tell me about their best friend, they share all the great things about this person. Then they tell me that they would love to meet someone who would be like their best friend. This is the person you look forward to spending time with and desire to be around a lot!

2. Does this person show kindness and compassion towards others?

What kind of heart does he or she have? Does he take in stray animals or does she volunteer to help the sick or the less fortunate? And how forgiving is his or her nature? Is she kind to you and empathizes with you when you’ve had a bad day? For many, kindness and compassion are at the top of the list when choosing a life partner.

One of my clients was taking care of his elderly mother. And it was important that the woman he dated appreciated his devotion to be there for his mother and not consider it a burden on the relationship. The woman he married thought it an admirable quality to have as she was choosing her life partner.

However, when someone lacks empathy or compassion for those who are less fortunate, that is a deal breaker for many of my clients. How about you?

3. Is this person encouraging and supportive?

We hope that our partner becomes our greatest fan and supports us as we are building our lives. Some dating tips for men include that you cheer her on during difficult times, and don’t forget to tell her you believe in her. Of course, this is a two-way street. She should be equally supportive of you; maybe picking up the slack when you have obligations or are pursuing a goal.

In choosing your life partner, you desire that your partner is encouraging and supportive of your work and passions. You don’t want a partner who is resentful of the time and energy you spend in accomplishing your goals. Or may be upset with the time you spend with your grandkids.

Kathy was a retired widowed Boomer who had her own interests and goals. When she met Doug, he also had his responsibilities and activities he enjoyed. Kathy wanted to hike the Alps and Doug supported her by helping her train for such an adventure by hiking 5 miles a day with her during the week. It’s heartwarming to see how they support each other in every way!

4. Does this person show appreciation?

The ability to recognize when someone has gone out of your way or done something nice for you seems like a lost art. Just saying these simple words, “I appreciate what you have done” just makes someone’s day. One can never express too much appreciation! This is also important dating advice for women.

When a man travels to your side of town to meet you, it’s important to acknowledge that. And when a woman hires a sitter to have a date with you, again, you will have her attention if you share that you appreciate what she did to make the date happen. For many, showing appreciation is an important quality to look for when choosing your life partner.

5. Is this person respectful of you and others?

Being able to remain respectful of another although you may not agree with that person takes a lot of class. It’s even harder to treat someone with respect when you are under stress. Always treat each other like delicate China, where you can break a strong bond with the slip of a hurtful tongue. Nasty remarks and put-downs are damaging to any relationship and should not be tolerated.

If a person is disrespectful of you while you’re dating, then watch out when you are a couple. While choosing your life partner, observe how they treat others who serve them in restaurants or in the store while shopping.

6. Is this person open and willing to work on enhancing the relationship?

Open and honest communication is the key to any relationship. As part of a couple, you need to be willing to listen to constructive comments and requests from your partner. It’s important to hear your partner’s side and vice versa. If you reach a deadlock without any viable solutions, be willing to seek help from an impartial third party to resolve major relationship issues.

When choosing your life partner, it’s important to be able to work out disagreements in a respectful manner and also to take proactive steps to improve the relationship. A desire to work on the relationship is a good sign and something to seek out in a life partner.

7. Does this person think and act in a “we” manner, not a “me” manner?

When choosing your life partner, does he or she think of how his or her actions will affect you? Are your thoughts and feelings taken into consideration? Is there a goal of compromise for the sake of the relationship? A relationship cannot survive on doing for “me” alone!

To be in a relationship with an individual who is “divided” in his/her thinking with the “me” only syndrome creates a wedge in the relationship. Be on the lookout for someone who does not appear to be selfish or self-centered, and is willing to be sensitive to your feelings, desires, and needs. Additionally, it’s important that you also demonstrate this quality, as well.

Suppose for example, that you have been dating someone for a considerable amount of time, and you’re now seriously considering if this individual could be “the one”. The two of you begin to discuss your finances. Carefully consider if the individual is discussing your future with a “me” alone approach to the finances, or if he/she is including you in his/her future financial plans and goals.
 
Hopefully, your potential partner is thinking of you as a couple and making decisions accordingly. If he or she is excluding you in the decision-making, then you need to discuss how you feel and see if the person understands your position. If for some reason this person continues to be self-oriented, then you may decide to move on.

These are just a few of the top qualities to look for in a potential spouse.

In my Motivated to Marry program, I help you flush out those qualities and values that are most important to you and the life you long for. Understanding your values and staying focused on the qualities that you want to see in a life partner will help you not get distracted by emotions or manipulations when choosing him/her.

If you are still looking, stay positive. He or she is out there waiting for you! And if you need some support and guidance in choosing your life partner more wisely this time around, let’s talk. Go to www.talkwithcoachamy.com to set up some time!