Word Salad Dementia: Tips for Conversations That Don’t Make Sense
Elderly parents with dementia can eventually lose their language skills. They may speak and their words or sentences don’t make sense. This loss of words is called word salad dementia. What can family members and friends do to maintain relationships that no longer rely on verbal communication?
Some family caregivers with years of experience caring for a loved one can learn to read the body language and the behavior patterns of the person with dementia. The caregiver learns to interpret word salad dementia conversations.
Persons who don’t have as much contact with an elderly parent or loved one with dementia or experience with dementia can be uncomfortable about how to respond to a loved one with dementia. They do not know how to respond to word salad dementia conversations.
Disappearing Family and Friends
Family members or friends may not be comfortable watching the changes in a loved one. They do not know how to interact with persons with dementia who speak in word salad terms.
Caregivers say that family and friends who used to visit and call have disappeared. Even close family members like brothers and sisters stop visiting.
Friends no longer call or visit. It is almost as if an elderly parent’s social circle disappears because the person with dementia can no longer interact the way that family members or friends expect them to act. For persons with dementia,
a single word can mean a lot. Words have significant meaning.
Disappearing family and friends can also happen when there is a lack of education about how to interact with or talk to loved ones with dementia. If you are the caregiver, your skills have likely grown over time. Some days, it’s trial and error.
Sometimes, the primary caregiver accepts the responsibility of educating family and friends to help the person with dementia maintain routine activities and social interactions.
Simple things become difficult for persons with dementia. The Downside of Isolation
In other situations, caregivers may want to protect loved ones from social embarrassment by limiting their social interactions. Persons with dementia can experience anxiety when being approached by people in public who know them but who they no longer remember.
However, there is a benefit for persons with dementia in maintaining social connections with others as long as the interactions are positive. Isolating loved ones because going out may become more difficult can have
negative consequences for the caregiver and the person with dementia.
Isolation can be harmful for the person with memory loss, and it’s not good for the emotional and physical health of the caregiver. Caregiver burnout is common when persons with dementia need more and more care. Being a full-time caregiver can be exhausting.
Because the work of caregiving is exhausting, family and friend interactions or hiring outside assistance is even more critical when the person with dementia is isolated and living alone with a caregiver.
Tips to Visit and Communicate
Even if you feel uncomfortable visiting, think of your visit as giving the caregiver a break or making the visit about spending time with a loved one or a good friend. The visit becomes less about you and more about what you can give to the caregiver and the person with dementia who speaks in word salad terms.
Visits from family members and friends are like a breath of fresh air.
- The person with dementia can tell their stories to someone who has not heard them before.
- The visitor may be more patient in helping the person with dementia try new activities.
- Visitors can bring activities with them that do not require speaking or following a conversation
When loved ones with dementia have difficulty communicating, they
communicate with behaviors that may not always be positive. Some persons with dementia hallucinate, hear voices, and can be physically aggressive.
Word Salad Dementia: How to Respond When You Have No Idea What a Loved One Is Saying
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Simple interactions can help a loved one with dementia remain connected to loved ones. The
impact of dementia on spouses who are often 24/7 caregivers is significant.
Routine Interactions are Beneficial
Consider visiting and taking a friend or loved one out of the house to walk in the neighborhood, go to the Zoo, or enjoy a bowl of ice cream on a hot day.
Walking, looking at the scenery, or eating ice cream doesn’t require detailed conversations. They are activities that can reduce stress about responding to word salad dementia conversations.
Simple activities create a personal connection that makes the person with dementia feel loved.
If you are nervous about taking a person with dementia out of the home, keep them by your side at all times because they can wander off and get lost. Ask the primary caregiver what is important to know about the habits of the person with dementia. Ask if the caregiver will be available for a phone call if something unexpected happens.
Trust that you will do the right thing.
Learning how to deal with dementia is a learned skill. Physical activity is extremely important for persons with dementia. While it may be easy for you to walk, talk, and chew gum, this combination of activities becomes difficult for persons with dementia.
Daily activity helps a person with dementia continue to walk and be able to perform physical activities.
- Have them follow you in doing some simple exercises.
- Find a Sit and Be Fit Class on YouTube and do the activities with them.
Get Comfortable with the Unpredictable
As memory loss advances, uncomfortable moments can occur. For example, you may not know what to say when elderly parents forget your name or who you are. The
signs and progression of dementia are different with every person.
Don’t make a big deal of it. Say, I’m your daughter Mary, or I’m your friend Fred.
Persons with dementia can also have difficulty naming items. Did you ever have one of those days yourself?
You’re trying to recall information; that word or idea just doesn’t come. And then five minutes later, you remember.
The difference with loved ones who speak in word salad terms is that they are beyond remembering. Memory loss is progressive. Your loved one used to be able to speak full sentences like most people.
Over time, their sentences became shorter and then only one-word responses. Today, they can’t follow a conversation because, by the time you get to the end of a sentence, they forget the beginning of the sentence.
Dementia Communication Challenges
People with memory loss can think that an apple is an orange. When this happens, go with it. Don’t correct them.
The goal of spending time with them is not about being right or trying to help a loved one remember; it’s all about creating a positive experience.
Persons with dementia repeat words. They have greater difficulty putting sentences together.
When you interact with a person with dementia, it is essential to be extremely patient, kind, and compassionate. If you are anxious, your loved one or friend with dementia may read your body language and become anxious themselves. Smile and be relaxed in your interactions.
Mirroring behaviors, as long as they are positive and calm, can be a good way to interact with loved ones diagnosed with memory loss without speaking. Remember the game Simon says?
Word Salad Dementia
Let’s talk more about mixing up words which is often called “word salad dementia”.
Think about tossing a bunch of words written on single pieces of paper into a bowl, taking them out one after the other, and trying to make a sentence. The sentence probably doesn’t make sense.
In other situations, your elderly parent may be pointing or looking at one thing and talking about something totally different. Word salad sentences may come out like: eat the cow on the table, the purple thing outside the window, babies drink trees, the bus runs fast up there.
Communicating with your loved one can be frustrating for you because you are trying to make sense of these words and conversations. Smile and put your arm around your elderly parent.
Give them a hug. Reassure them that you love them. That’s all they really need to know.
Did you ever consider how you hear word salad dementia talk may be how they hear you talk? There’s no way to know.
Shift to Non-Verbal Communication
When word salad dementia progresses, words and conversations mean less than interactions. Think about how you can interact and shift to nonverbal communication.
How would you interact or communicate with people if you could not understand what they were saying and you could not speak or write?
That’s a tough question, isn’t it?
Imagine yourself in a foreign country. No one knows what you are saying.
Memory loss might be a lot like being in a foreign country and not knowing the language. You’re trying to find a street or a restaurant or your friend’s house. The words you hear and the words you say don’t make sense, and you’re frustrated.
This experience can be what it’s like for persons with memory loss. We really don’t know, and they can’t tell us.
What we do know is that
positive interactions with persons with memory loss help them feel safe.
Activities That Don’t Require Talking
So, to create positive interactions without speaking, think of activities that don’t require talking. Did your loved one play cards, hike, garden, woodwork, or exercise? Think of things they might still be able to do or that you can modify or simplify.
Does it really matter if you turn cards up and down on the table without playing a game and having a winner? What about taking towels out of a closet, refolding them, and putting them back? What about playing with Silly Putty, finger painting, or coloring?
These activities may seem pointless to you because they have no results. However, the interaction is important to consider when your only conversations are mixed up word salad dementia.
When I was a care manager and a guardian, I had clients who would take all the clothes out of their dressers and put the items back. Others would reorganize their closets for hours.
They were happy doing these activities, didn’t remember doing them the day before, and did the same thing every day.
My parents had a junk drawer where they put anything that didn’t go somewhere else. Sorting through a junk drawer can be an activity.
The activity is more about being with the person than doing something with a result or an outcome.
Stress Reduction Activities
Some family members create a fidget mat or a fidget blanket, a piece of cloth 12 x 24 or 24 x 24 on which they sew buttons, different types of cloth, or other things to engage the hands and the senses.
How many of you like to pop the bubbles in that plastic wrap that comes in a box when you order something? Offering this type of activity can give
adult children dementia caregivers a break.
How many of you have those stress balls or items on your desk that you play with to calm yourself down? The idea is the same: put something in your hand or hold something to bring you to the present moment to
reduce stress or anxiety.
Many persons with dementia carry a stuffed animal or a doll for comfort.
Playing music and dancing or singing can be an uplifting activity. Persons with dementia can sing songs when they may not be able to put a sentence together.
Music memory is amazing. Think of listening to music.
You hear a song from twenty years ago. You sing every word. Music makes us happy. It lifts our mood. It makes us smile. Sometimes, we reminisce about music and special events.
Play music, get up, and dance with your loved one.
Use Visual Clues and Stop Asking Questions
Train yourself to stop asking questions. No more questions.
People ask questions because they don’t know what to say or they want to start a conversation.
As your loved one continues to lose conversational skills, stop asking questions. If you are the caregiver, begin using visual clues.
Put a plate down with food rather than asking a loved one if they are hungry. Make meals that involve finger foods instead of requiring forks, spoons, or knives, which can become difficult for a person with dementia.
Walk with a loved one to the bathroom instead of asking them if they need to use the bathroom. They may not know, but if you take them, they will likely know what you are asking them to do.
Hold hands when speaking to a loved one with memory loss, smile, and make eye contact. Offer hugs and reassurance. Sit next to them on the couch.
Find Ways to Create Connections
Find ways to create a sense of connection. Anyone can learn to adapt their interaction skills to build interpersonal and social interactions with another person.
Small things you can do include humming, laughing, nodding, or shaking your head yes or no, shrugging shoulders, smiling, raising eyebrows, blowing a kiss, winking, nodding, closing your eyes, or shaking hands in agreement.
Make memories while you still can. As memory loss progresses,
your loved one will be able to do less and less. They will become less physically active and need more hands-on care.
Their caregiver will need and appreciate any time you can give, so please visit, call and offer any type of help or support you can. You have no idea how much the time you give will make a difference.
Give Mom or Dad a hand or foot massage, brush their hair, or put lotion on their skin. These little things mean so much, and they will help the primary caregiver.
If your loved one moves into a care community or a nursing home. Visit even if it’s only for half an hour a week.
You never know how much seeing or having you around makes a difference for them. Even if there are no more conversations, play some music. Sit and read a book if they are napping. Your presence alone can make a difference.
Get to know the care staff in the care community. Staff who know that family members and friends visit are more likely to be more attentive to the residents.
Visit on a regular schedule.Say hello to the
care staff in communities who also experience high levels of stress.
Most of all, give a big kiss and a hug before you leave because you never know when that last goodbye will come.
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