By John Edwards, CSP

Have you ever wondered what separates mundane monologues from magnificent messaging? The answer lies not just in your content but in the neuroscience of how your audience receives it. By understanding how the brain processes information, you can transform yourself from a forgettable fact-giver to a memorable mind-mover.

The Speaker-Audience Dance

Speaking is a lot like dancing. When I moved to coastal North Carolina a few years back, I discovered the local passion for Shag Dancing. If you’re not familiar, it’s this smooth, fluid partner dance that looks effortless when done right. But get the timing wrong and suddenly you’re both fumbling awkwardly as if one of you is stepping barefoot on hot coals

Your relationship with your audience works the same way.

When a presentation flows perfectly, it’s because the speaker and the audience are moving in harmony. This concept is a derivative of the neuroscience concept of Fluency. The audience leans in when you build tension, exhales when you release it, and processes information exactly when you need them to. It’s a beautiful synchronicity, kind of like a dance where both are flowing together without much thought as if muscle memory has taken over.

But how do we create this perfect dance? This is where neuroscience comes in.

The Advocate Vs. Adversary Principle

Your audience’s brain makes a critical decision within the first 45-90 seconds of your talk: Are you a threat or an ally?

This isn’t a conscious choice. It’s happening at a reactive level in the amygdala, commonly known as the threat-detection center of the brain. When your audience perceives you as an adversary (even subtly), their brains literally process your information differently. Keep in mind, they may not even be aware yet that they are perceiving you that way.  To some, it’s more like a gut feeling where they might say to themselves, “there is just something about that guy that makes me itchy…” Studies show that when people feel defensive, they:

• Remember 37% less information.
• Become more rigid in their thinking.
• Process your words through a more critical filter.

But when they see you as an advocate, which is someone who is genuinely interested in their success, then the floodgates open. Their brains release oxytocin, the bonding hormone, and suddenly they’re not just hearing your words; they’re receiving them.

How quickly can you create a moment that screams (not literally), “I see you, I get you, and I’m here for YOU.” It’s the speaking equivalent of bringing really good homemade cookies to a new neighbor, except for less calories and more career advancement.

The Power of the Pause

One of the most underutilized speaking tools is the humble pause. In our rush to deliver information, we often forget that our audience’s brains need processing time.

Here’s what happens when you deliver point after point without pausing:

Your audience’s working memory gets overwhelmed. This is part of what we refer to as Cognitive Load Theory. Their brains literally can’t file away one concept before you’re introducing the next. It’s like trying to organize a filing cabinet while papers are still being shoved at you or like me trying to eat boiled peanuts while explaining quantum physics. Neither ends well.

My move to North Carolina revealed something fascinating about research on regional communication patterns. A 2018 study in the Journal of Pragmatics found that Southern American English speakers use pauses nearly 40% more frequently than Northeastern speakers, with an average pause length 2.3 seconds longer. These pauses are cultural tools for processing and connection. Did you get that… cultural tools for creating connections. Hmmm, wouldn’t that be cool to leverage as we build relationships with our audiences? Research by Dr. Deborah Tannen at Georgetown University demonstrates that these regional pause patterns directly impact information retention, with audiences reporting 23% higher comprehension when presentations incorporated strategic silence. These pauses create essential cognitive space for deeper connection and understanding. In your presentations, strategic pauses and repetition allow your audience’s brains to:

1. Process what you’ve just said.
2. Form neural connections to existing knowledge.
3. Generate emotional responses.
4. Prepare for new information.

Think of it as letting the flavor of your words marinate. Just like Carolina BBQ sauce needs time to sink in (and yes, I’ve learned it’s quite different from the tangy tomato-based sauce I grew up with), your ideas need time to penetrate.

Back to Our Dance

In Shag Dancing, there’s a fundamental pattern called the “basic.” It’s six steps that create the foundation for everything else. The magic happens because both partners know exactly when to step and when to wait.

Your presentations need the same rhythm. When you respect your audience’s cognitive processing needs, you create a presentation that feels effortless. You’re not dragging them along or talking over their mental questions. You’re dancing together (remember Fluency and Cognitive Load Theory). You need to allow them to “sit in the moment” with you.

When I coach other speakers, I usually help them identify what I call “enthusiasm overload,” because I’m intimately familiar with this condition myself. You know those moments when you’re so excited about your material that words start pouring out like you’ve just chugged three espressos? I once got so carried away explaining communication theory that my timer went off and I realized I’d covered only two slides in twenty minutes. My poor audience looked like they’d been watching a ping-pong match while riding a roller coaster.

Talk about humbling! For a while after that, I kept a Post-it note on my laptop that simply reads “PAUSE.” This was a reminder that my excitement doesn’t automatically equal audience comprehension.

Three Simple Steps to Start

Here are three practical things you can implement immediately:

1. Open with connection, not credentials. Share something that shows you understand their world before establishing your expertise. This signals to their brain that you’re an advocate, not an adversary.
2. After each key point, pause for 3-4 seconds. It will feel uncomfortably long at first (like my first taste of authentic southern sweet tea felt uncomfortably sweet!), but your audience needs this time to process.
3. Ask yourself: “What do I want them to feel right now?” Emotions create stronger neural pathways than facts alone. Where do you have moments in your content where they can “sit with it?” When you intentionally craft emotional moments, you’re creating memories that stick.

Remember, the best speakers aren’t those with the most information; it is those whose information is inspirational and remembered. When you do this well, you and your audience will be dancing together in perfect harmony, creating an experience that not only transforms but is enjoyable.

Now, who’s ready to dance? Just promise me you won’t judge my Shag technique because my dance instructor says I have “enthusiastic potential,” which I’m pretty sure is Southern for “bless your heart, you should stick to Disco.”

About John:

John F. Edwards, CSP, has been a professional member of NSA for 30 years, serving in several leadership roles in different chapters. He has been using neuroscience to train other speakers, facilitators, executives and corporate trainers for over two decades.  His client list is filled mostly by Fortune 100 companies who continue to bring him back again and again. He is the author of several books that leverage neuroscience to help people accelerate their success.